Sorry
by Agent Green Ushanka
Summary: Kyle calls Stan on his birthday.  Post 1507 drabble.


_...Uh, hey guys._

_Agent Green Ushanka here._

_I know I've been gone for like a year, sorry :x I get really picky about my writing and never want to put it up because I think it's bad! I just had to do something for the new episode._

_I cried just.. a lot. It really hit home, I guess. My parents got divorced when I was around the boy's age (I think a year or two younger..). I don't know, it really made me think about my friends and family and how cynical I am. I just felt bad._

_AND WTF. Stan can't just leave Kyle like that, what a douche._

_I knew shit got real when Kyle and Cartman looked at each other._

_Okay, so I know Stan seems like a total dick in this, I'm sorry. This was gonna be a lemon, but I figured this drabbley thing is better._

_And yes, I used second person, it was just going out on a limb for me, trying new stuff. And I think it works.. I hope it does._

_Thank you to everyone sending messages to me asking about my well-being, I'm fine, just a little lazy. Sorry I didn't update anything, guys._

_I'm really... really lazy._

_Also, sorry about how short this is :( I might write a lemon on 1507 soon. WHATEVER._

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><p>"Well, how was your sixteenth birthday, dude?" You know the answer to your own question just as the words escape your lips, and you know what's coming next, but the other line just stays quiet for a while.<p>

"...It was shitty." The words make you cringe a bit, and no matter how many times he's said this now, you never know how to respond. So you just laugh evenly, as if this was all a joke.

You wish it was.

Your name is Kyle Broflovski, and this happens every time you two talk. Stan doesn't respond much and acts like a dick when he does, but despite this, you still consider him your super best friend. You still would bend over backwards for him, you still care about how he's doing, even if he only tells you that he's feeling shitty, how everything is shitty.  
>You try to text him as often as possible, pace the fact that he very seldom answers. You think you may be annoying him, but he insists that it's fine.<p>

His birthday has been a bad day for you for the past six years, but you try to pretend you forgot about stuff like that, especially to avoid Cartman's ridicule.

You know he would have a field day if he found out that you stay in the bathroom and sob like a little girl all day on each September 19th. You're sure you would never hear the end of it if he found out you've been doing that for the past six years.

"Did you get anything?" You ask after a long silence. You can hear Stan sigh a bit on the other line.

"Nothing I wanted." He says stoically. His voice is different from when you talked to him last, it's lower and tired, but you'd never admit that you like how it sounds. You switch your cellphone from your right ear to the left and rest it between your head and shoulder, sinking further into your mattress.

You finally let out a hushed, "Sorry." But you're not apologizing for his shitty 16th birthday, you're apologizing for everything, because you still can't shake the feeling that this is all your fault. Maybe if you didn't get Stan that stupid Gersploosh album, he wouldn't have turned into a cynical douche.  
>His parents wouldn't have divorced and he wouldn't have up and moved to Chicago without saying goodbye. You don't understand why he still talks to you, or at least puts up with you, but you do know that you're thankful he does.<p>

You can hear Stan's dad calling him over the line, followed by a weak sigh from your friend, "I have to go, Kyle."

You try not to let out a shaky breath, "Oh. Okay, dude."

"Sorry." He adds, and you almost break at that. You don't think he should be apologizing for any of this.

"I miss you, Stan." You say quietly. You don't expect him to say anything back, and he doesn't. He just chuckles weakly before he hangs up without saying goodbye.

You listen to the dial tone for a moment before delicately announcing, "I love you.." into the dead line.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading 3 :<strong>


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